DMV line out the door

by Scott Smith

In Michigan, your license stickers are up for renewal on your birthday (Hint: mine is 7/3 and there’s a PayPal button in the Tip Jar page :->). My possible jury duty stint — 6 weeks — begins Monday. I wanted to get this over in case my panel was called.

The Barry County Michigan DMV office has never been crowded. Until Friday. They were out the door and lining the hallway. All I can say is I’m glad I brought a book.

I grabbed my ticket from its dispenser. I was behind 25 people.

Let me interrupt the narrative with this — there are no public bathrooms in the building. I know this because just about every door has that message. If you know me, you know that makes me flinch a bit. Diabetics like me do two things all day long: drink a lot and piss even more.

I settle in and read and people gaze. A lot of teenagers. Really, a lot of teenage girls. Happy teenage girls with their families. I can’t imagine why. They are stuck in a Russian style bread line on a lovely day in a building with no public restroom access.

I return to my book.

The teenagers are every where. I mean aren’t they old enough to just hang at home, get tans, update their MySpace page, and play with their Wii? There are whole families here on a Friday afternoon. Bizarre.

I’m behind 15 more people when I leave the building in search of a public restroom. Found a grocery store down the road.

Ok, back in line. 10 more to go.

One of the DMV guys is walking around with a form pad. I overhear him have a conversation with a dad. He mentions that four high schools had finished their driving programs that day.

Doah!!!! Happy teenagers with their parents at the DMV are there for only one reason — getting their license to drive away from their parents and siblings.